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SOSSAMS

(Society Of Sherlockians Against Mary-Sues)

Stories Randominity

Mission Statement(s)

Sunny's Mission Statement:

Nothing to lose but your chains – you have a world to win! Slashers of all countries, unite!

In fact, not just slashers. Anyone who has noticed the plague of Mary-Sues in Sherlock Holmes fanfiction – unite! Throw off your chains! We have to act now – quickly – to counter the poisonous sweetness of these sickly, uncharacterised Mary-Sues.

Oh, we’ve all found them. By accident, I hope. Pretty girls who quite unaccountably capture our dear Sherlock’s heart. Twenty-first century girls... American... who are just walking quietly along and get sucked into Victorian London... and cope amazingly with the lack of Starbucks, Tampax and Kleenex? Okay, I’m generalising appallingly. Some of them are even worse.

All joking apart, these are ruining the quality of fanfiction. Even the well-written ones lack a certain spontaneity – you have to be a superb writer to pull off a Mary-Sue. And as fans we have a duty to Sherlock Holmes and Doctor Watson. Eradicate this menace – now!

Esty's Mission Statement:

Sunny's statement is her words, hers alone, I didn't touch 'em. But there's one kind of Mary-Sue in Sherlockian fanfiction who will be missed even less than any of the ones on her list. That is the detective sort of Mary-Sue.

These... ladies all have something in common: whether they're Victorian (a historical impossibility, under the cirumstances), or from the 21st century (a scientific impossibility), or from outer space (really bad plot device), they all have one thing in common: they can outdo our dear Sherlock at his own game (a literary impossibility). There is one exception to this rule whom I know of, and she is the (annoying) Beth Lestrade of the cartoon "Sherlock Holmes in the 22nd Century". She can't quite outdo Holmes, which is presumably why she brought him back from the dead as a handsome twenty-something-year-old to battle a clone of Professor Moriarty. The fact that she works with Holmes every day seems to have led many people to think that she and Holmes are soulmates or some other nonsense like that. People who think like this should be tied up and shot. Mercifully. (Don't want to seem too psycho...)

As an additional note, anyone who doubts my slasher-ness because of the lack of mentions of slash in the previous paragraphs is advised to email me.


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